The Weekly – Why Bite About It?

When you Get Bit – Or bite – Fix it Fast.

My little, old dog Stewart seems to forget past tussles. He has had at least four major altercations with my big, young dog Clayton in the last three years.

As dogs, they fight, they bite and then they move on (Though the vet bills are mounting…)

Do you do that as a business owner?

What I mean is, do you remember or forget past tussles? Past slights or rudeness?

Recently a man I know mentioned that he and a group of very interested wine drinkers/buyers rented a bus and went tasting to add to their extensive cellars. They had already been to 3 wineries and there was something like $3500 in wine in the van already when they stopped at a new place.

Apparently, they were not treated very well and no one bought any wine. A tussle, a big loss for the winery but not the end of the story. This man wanted to alert the winery owner about what had happened in hopes to help them. He sent an email explaining what happened.

This is the key place where there could have simply been a bite to forget about.

Instead, the winery owner came back and justified the poor treatment, basically said, “I don’t believe you, or I don’t care to improve” and then he might have forgotten about it, but the man I was talking to hadn’t.

If it had been as simple as my dogs, both would have moved on, instead, the wine buyer felt like he got bit twice. Once when the group was treated poorly and a second time through email denial.

You know the rest, he sent that less-than-stellar response to the rest of the group and they will share it around other bottles of wine with other buyers and what happens to the rude winery is probably not hard to figure out.

Lesson to remember. No matter who bites who, no matter what happens, making things right in the end is the beginning of good things. Not making things right (sometimes as simple as an apology) will be a bite that will come around and no doubt bite you again.

Blessings, Shawna

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The Weekly – The Bill Made My Jaw Drop

My eyes got large…

My horse trailer had two small lights out. One in the tack room and one in the main part where two horses travel. I’m thinking, this is an easy fix. I’ll drop it off at the trailer place and pick it up next week prior to my trip over the mountain. Don’t you love it when you get stuff done? When you drop off the dry cleaning, stop at the post office and all those other mundane tasks that can swallow up a day? I didn’t think another thing about it until they called to ask if I wanted LED lights instead of what was there. “Cost?” I inquired. I’m on a budget after all and didn’t want this small job to balloon. “Only $2 dollars more.” So I told them to go ahead…When I got the bill (and remember this is a used two horse trailer that the outside and blinker lights worked fine on… it was for $521.95!!!!!!  I’ve not gone in to talk with them, I haven’t picked it up yet – they aren’t even open Sunday and Monday  (Why should they be when they charge so much for so little???) Oops – did bitterness just leak out of my fingers? Forgive me. When I go in I will ask for a detailed explanation, I will also put it in context that my Jeep just had a new wiper engine, a replaced battery (exchanged actually) and two front shocks replaced for only $350 including labor… and see what they say. It really doesn’t matter if they reduce it, though I have my hopes up! What matters is the lessons I want to share with you. What did I do to contribute to what I consider being grossly overcharged?

  1. I assumed. That it was a small job so a smaller price. I also assumed they would not charge double what the auto mechanic I use charges for labor. ASSUMING is not smart!
  2. I didn’t get a quote for the work.  Had I asked them for a quote, or checked their labor prices I would have gone elsewhere, or at least explored my options.
  3. I was focused on the task, NOT the result. Dropping off the trailer was my focus, not what I wanted, nor the cost. I dropped it off to give them ample time to work on it but other than that didn’t do my own due diligence and this is the biggest lesson of all.

When you are embarking on anything – asking – “What do I want as a result?” is going to help you in various ways. Here’s hoping I learned these lessons well, since they cost me $521.95 to learn, but hey, who’s counting? (Apparently me…)Let me know what techniques you use to ascertain you aren’t overcharged.

Blessings, Shawna

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The Weekly – What Agreements Have You Made with Yourself?

What do you do with Rude People?

Don Miguel Ruiz wrote the book, “The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom” in 1997 and it’s still one of those books I will review and recommend to this day, and here is why it may be time for you to dip your toes into this deep and refreshing pool of wisdom.

Let me give them to you in the simplest form so you can think about them and if you are living them and why one I’m going to stress today could be the key to higher levels of success for you and your business.

The Four Agreements:

  1. Be Impeccable with Your Word
  2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
  3. Don’t Make Assumptions
  4. Always Do Your Best

Today let’s unpack number 2 – Don’t take anything personally. Oh how I wish this were easy, but I have found that it’s not.

So here are some tips you can use immediately to help you when:

  • Someone does not like your selections, or taste, or offer or service.
  • A person tells you something that feels hurtful or unkind
  • You ask for someone’s opinion and they give what you consider brutal feedback
  • Someone cuts you off mid-sentence or on the freeway
  • The person you are trying to serve is distracted or rude

ALL of these actions are about THEM – not you, not ever.

Then the question becomes how do I deal with this person?

(I really wanted to say, rude or uninformed person – but wouldn’t that be a judgment?) Alas, my humanness is ever present!

The two tools or tactics I use (and which have helped me in countless ways) are:

1.  Simply say, “Thank you”  And stop talking.

 

They will be startled no doubt, they may continue on with their thoughts or tirade for a moment however since you have not defended yourself or your business or actions, you’ve simply thanked them, the exchange will end soon.

Saying thank you for any feedback, criticism or rude behavior is not normal so it will help you to – stay calm and allow them to stop. Remember this is NOT about you, so saying, “Thank you.” or even, “Thank you for being yourself” will make this exchange less painful and maybe help the other person become more aware.

2. If Thank You isn’t appropriate and they are actually mad, or brutal in their feedback, you can then simply say, “Forgive me”

 

 

Remember this is not about you, but when you ask for forgiveness for things that aren’t about you, it stops the other person from continuing – it puts the ball in their court and what kind of person doesn’t forgive someone else? Not one you want in your life or business, right?

Note, that I did not suggest you say, “I’m sorry” you may and probably aren’t sorry and that sometimes keeps the other person going with, “You should be!” When you say, “Forgive me? Or Please Forgive me?” you have stopped them and asked them a question which shifts the energy.

There is one last thing I sometimes do… it’s kind of silly but has helped me when I’m in a group, I put on an invisible suit of armor– no one can see it but nothing negative is getting in! That way I can stick to this wonderful and life changing agreement to:

Not Take Anything Personally

Your feedback is always welcome! And – I won’t take it personally!

Blessings, Shawna

Let us know you are coming! Are you exhibiting?
Want to hear more about a WIPIN Reception?

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STAY TUNED for the upcoming issue of Top Women in the Pet Industry Magazine.  

Do you want a little help with your goals and routines? Executive Coaching may be the ticket! Click here to schedule a complimentary session with Shawna to discuss your goals.

 Follow on: Facebook  |  Twitter  |  Instagram  |  Pinterest  | LinkedIn

  

Copyright © 2018 |  Women In The Pet Industry Network | All rights reserved.